Nichelle Newsletter

Everybody's Blogging For The Weekend

In honor of Memorial Day, today I blog to “memorialize” the events of last night. First, I got downtown and at the corner of Stanton and Orchard, I luckily met up with Lustylady and GirlyNYC at Arlene’s Grocery. It was party and reading to celebrate Abby’s birthday and the release of a new magazine, Playground. Jayme and Lustylady’s readings were funny and hot respectively.
Then Lusty, Girly and I head up to 10th & A for a pre-Memorial Day bash at Hi-Fi (formerly Brownies).

Now I can dismiss with the senseless foreplay and start the blogf#*$ing. Nick Denton and Choire Sicha were walking out as we came in. TMFTML and Lindsayism greeted us happily even though we just saw each other two days ago. Who says the blogoisie aren't friendly?! Felix greeted me with a hug and then lamented the fact that jukebox did not carry Neneh Cherry. (I love “Buffalo Stance”!) Krucoff was talking about Hanson at the bar. I met Old Hag and Missrepresentation. I was flummoxed! Neither of them resembled their blog names. I also met the Real Janelle, who is really nice! Manhattan Transfer was there looking quite spiffy in his suit, and he said he would come to my comedy show Tuesday where Jessy Delfino will perform. Also, the great Kate Lee was in attendance and I shamelessly gave her my card, because I anxiously await the day that a snobby British editor tells me that my writing is crap and I “should go back to the colonies”!

I Wanna Be Sedated

Ok, so I go the Ritalin Readings at Pianos to check it out and support my fellow "Ladies' First" gals, Lindsayism and Ultragrrrl.
Ultragrrrl was the hostess with the mostest as she casually comments about dead people. A couple of people from Black Table read, and this guy Nick from Comedy Central read some seriously funny stuff. The program curated by Lindsay was short and sweet, and then I got an opportunity to talk to Lustylady and TMFTML about make-up and padded bras. Now I really want a nice sponsorship deal with Agent Provocateur, and I wonder if my new friend, The New Face Of Evil can help me with that one!

Cream

Blueberry Hill
I find my thrill, checking out those fine officers in town for Fleet Week. I salute you! The parade of ships commences Wednesday, May 26 and there are public ship tours everyday through Memorial Day. Three years ago, I met a young sailor and got a tour of a ship, and I learned an important lesson. Don’t wear flip-flops when touring a naval ship; it could be potentially embarrassing!

Raspberry Beret
The Loser’s Lounge is doing a tribute at the Fez Café to one of my favorite artists, Prince. They will sing Prince hits not the “symbol” tunes. I am super excited! I think I will be there this weekend waving my hands while singing along to “Purple Rain” and asking where’s my lighter, dude? I am so there!

Strawberry Letter 23
Emails are nice because they are fast and easy. Since it’s summer why not slow down and take a minute to write a letter to a long-distance friend or family member. You could use loose-leaf paper, but it’s nice to have special stationery like the stuff I found at Iomoi. They have a pretty selection of designs for note cards and invitations. Plus, they even have cute e-stationery for those special occasions like a quick thank-you to a friend for that tip on the Fire Island share!

Strawberry Fields Forever
On any given day, you can lounge on the lawn and people watch at Central Park, but that’s so boring. (Yawn!) There are so many lovely green spaces all over the city. There’s Hudson River, Riverside, Prospect and Fort Tryon Park, to name a few. Find out what’s happening this summer at http://www.nycgovparks.org/.

Cherry Pie
The funniest chicks in NYC are coming to the Laugh Lounge this Tuesday, June 1 at 8PM for my Chicks and Giggles show. It’s going to be a hilarious with the talented Michelle Maclay of Comedy Social as the Mistress of Ceremonies. Comediennes that are performing include Ana Carolina, Gayle Crispin, Jessy Delfino, Maux Kelly, Ellen Lloyd, Laura Mannino, Fiona Walsh and extra special guest who you may have seen on TV! Call the Laugh Lounge (151 Essex St) today for reservations.
Chicks and Giggles .

New York, New York

One of my favorites quotes about New York is this, "If you're not living in New York, then you must be kidding yourself."
Today, I have a different take on that quote, "If you're not blogging about New York, then you must be killing yourself!" To further prove this notion is the article in this week's New Yorker about bloggers.

A few of the blogs that are mentioned: Lindsayism, Eurotrash, MemeFirst, I Keep A Diary are written by brilliant people who I have recently met. It's cool to see this type of press, and I feel a part of it even though my blog is not included among the blogging all-stars. I am on the B-squad!

However, we do share things in common. Most of us have day jobs, but somehow we find morsels of time to share rants, recommendations, wit and the banalities of life with whomever serendipitously finds our site through a Google search.

Upside Down

Don't think that I have been resting on my laurels since last Wednesday because I haven't posted lately. On the contrary, I've had a busy couple of days. Thursday, I went to an opening reception at an art gallery in Chelsea. Friday I went to my friend Lee Ann's birthday party. Lee Ann is the lead singer of the Lascivious Biddies. It was fun with plenty of good champagne and cake! Saturday, I caught a nap, then went out to celebrate my roommate's birthday. Sunday, I cooked and hosted a dinner party for seven friends. (Yes, I have seven friends!) We had chicken drumsticks, salad, beans with apples and sausage casserole and fresh berries with mashmallow fluff and lemon wafers for dessert. I even made fresh-squeezed lemonade. Dinner was fantastic and my friends and I had a great time.

Damn you Monday, you come too soon like a premature ejaculator!

Word Up!

Gotta give it up to my man Krucoff who interviewed me this morning which was perfect timing. I love the Young Manhattanite Interview, and now I think this is a better honor than being in Page Six!

Thanks also to Chris for putting me on last night. You are my Bonita Applebaum!

Girls, Girls, Girls

The "Ladies First" reading was so much fun! I am now convinced that this was an early sign of the planet Venus' arrival in June. That would explain the excellent lineup of clever lady bloggers. The content was either about sex or drugs, and a lot of us (including me) used the "P" word in our prose. Shocking!

One of the highlights before the show even began was Rachel giving all of the bloggers free issues of Penthouse magazine and hearing Eurotrash squeal with a mixture of delight and surprise.

Ultragrrrl started the show with a bang with her reading about an illegal substance. Then I came up next with my reading that was a little sexual and a little funny. Jayme Waxman told a lovely story about her first kiss. GirlyNYC related a studly femme story that was set in idyllic Corvallis, Oregon. Blogger star Lindsayism wore a beautiful vintage dress as she read about projectile vomit and the dangers of taking acid. It was definitely a cautionary tale. Rachel's story about a lap dance was Hot! Eurotrash thrilled us all with her reading, and she claimed to be nervous! She was brilliant and I believe she's a ringer. Julie Andrews watch your back!
and Jessy Delfino ended the show with a hilarious drug smuggling story and lovesong.

We got drinks afterward at Standard where Standard Deviance and I chatted with a PR guy from The Week. I also talked to the very famous and petite Elizabeth Spiers, who I didn't know who she was initially. She's super nice. There may be plans to do a Sunday brunch which sounds perfect for a group of raunchy ladies!

Been Around The World

The evening started out innocently with a nice drink at Lemon with friends. Then we decided to have a bite to eat at Zen Palate. We spotted Moby there having dinner, but we didn’t stay to eat. We went to Republic instead. After dinner, we parted ways as I wanted to continue the Nike scavenger hunt game. After finding the next poster, I stopped by Tom & Jerry where I met an old Irish friend who was too drunk yet too happy to see me. I pryed myself away from him in favor Double Happiness, but that grew boring so I went to O’Neals where I met a geezer who wanted to take me home. I was not interested and grabbed a cab. Luckily I was dodgeballed and Randy was at Pioneer Bar where I had my last drink of the evening and passionately talked about my comedy show, Chicks and Giggles. For the record, being single again SUCKS!

Ladies Night

I snook in and got the last contested spot for the “Ladies First” produced by WYSIWYG Talent Show on Tuesday May 18 at P.S. 122 at 7:30PM. It's only 7 bucks to see 8 hot women (myself included) read about the first time they ever...It’s a reading of female bloggers and I am a big supporter of female productions, hence my Chicks and Giggles show. I had never heard of WYSIWYG before, but I got a flyer when I was at the Blogger Event at the Apple Store last week. So I have been working on my piece for the past week, and it has been so much fun/torture. I will probably revise it at least ten times before it’s done so here’s a spicy excerpt.

I sensed that an orgasm was on the horizon, so I went through my to-do list in my head, titled “How to Come”. If I follow the list to the letter, two wonderful things happen, I am rendered totally relaxed and satisfied and hopefully you won’t ask me the stupidest even uttered out of a man’s mouth post-coital, “Did you come?”

Rachel Kramer Bussel LustyLady.blogspot.com

Jessica Delfino JessyDelfino.blogspot.com

GirlyNYC GirlyNYC.blogspot.com

Eurotrash www.upsaid.com/eurotrash

Sarah Lewitinn Ultragrrrl.blogspot.com

Lindsay Robertson Lindsayism.com

Jamye Waxman JamyeWaxman.com

The One I Love

One Way Or Another
According to Finn, “It’s good to have choices”. So Thursday is a good night to test that theory. This Thursday, May 13, Philadelphia’s funky and fabulous punk band, Stiffed, will be playing at Sin-e (148-150 Attorney St.) at 8PM. And my favorites, The Lascivious Biddies and The Dansettes will be playing at Pianos on Ludlow St. The Biddies come on take the stage at 10PM.

No One In The World
The craziness of the war in Iraq, the prisoner abuse and the atrocities of terrorism are stark examples that the world right now has some major issues. The world needs a big hug, and what better place to find it is at Washington Square Park where there’s a guy hugging strangers just for the hell of it!

One World
Lava Gina, a luscious world music lounge, is having a fabulous concert on Saturday May 15 with recording artists Nefertiti Jones and Ellis Hooks! Soul sensation Ellis Hooks has just released his latest album, “Uncomplicated”. 116 Avenue C between 7th and 8th Streets.

One Love
Spend Sunday evening in SoHo! My lovely friend Signe Grant is hosting a party this Sunday, May 16, at 203 Spring St from 7-11PM. The party is a fundraiser for an upcoming theatre project (an adaptation of Mallarme’s “A Throw Of The Dice”). The price is $20 and there’s a premium open bar featuring Absolut Vodka, 42 Below Vodka and Eagle Run Bourbon. Plus there will be a D.J. and raffle prizes. Yay! 203 Spring St is a very cool and comfy bar and lounge located at the corner of Spring and Sullivan Streets.

One More Chance
Dear Friends,
Do I have to threaten to move to Paris for you to come out on a weeknight?! I didn’t see many familiar faces at last night’s “Chicks and Giggles” which was the first comedy show I ever produced. I’m not trying to make you feel guilty, but this was a HUGE night for me, and I would have loved seeing your shiny, happy faces at the Laugh Lounge! The upside is that the event was a smashing success, and I’m doing it again Tuesday, June 1! Mark your calendars and put it in your Blackberry because it’s gonna be a great show. Be there! Call 212.614.2500 for reservations. Thanks a million!

Love Train

CC Railroad, an urban folk band, is having a CD Release party to celebrate the release of their latest CD, "Black Horse Motel" on Tuesday, May 11 at the venerable Bitter End 147 Bleecker Street
(between Thompson and LaGuardia). The music starts at 8:30 PM. Cover is $5.
Come party with Carolann, Cheryl, Ryder and Rich!
Check out their website: CC Railroad.

What's the Frequency, Kenneth?

What’s Love Got to Do With It?
Don’t just send your lovely mother flowers for Mother’s Day! Do it right and take your MOM to the Brooklyn Botanical Garden this weekend. Enjoy the lovely cherry blossoms and lilacs in bloom. Admission is only $5. She’ll love you for it!

Oh What A World
It’s ALIVE! The movie “Godzilla” is playing at the Film Forum (209 West Houston) starting Friday May 7 for only two weeks. It’s the original uncut Japanese version, so go see this classic flick. This is the kind of movie that popcorn was made for!

So What You Want
Two of my favorite things, sweets and books come together this Saturday at Dylan Candy Bar at 2:00PM. There will be a book signing of “Candyfreak”, the new book by author Steve Almond. “Candyfreak” chronicles the author’s lifelong quest for the perfect chocolate candy. If this book is as good as Almond’s last book, “My Life in Heavy Metal”, then readers are definitely in for a treat.

What I Got
I have got a great lineup of funny girls who will be performing comedy on Tuesday, May 11 at the Laugh Lounge 151 Essex St). The “Chicks and Giggles” show will feature Ellen Lloyd, Carolyn Castiglia, Jeannie Dean, Liz Maher, Abby Rosin, Jenny Rubin , Tasha Space and Jill Twiss. Get there at 8PM, cover is $8 with 2-drink minimum. Come on down and laugh!

What’s The 411?
Reading blogs are a surefire way to reduce your productivity at work by 40%. Who wants to work that hard anyway?! To find out the latest posts from your favorite blogs including mine, instead of surfing all over the net, you can simply subscribe to Kinja where you can find them all in one spot. It’s like one-stop shopping for the blog readers. You can read what I like to read by checking my digest. Now that's what I call efficient.

I Want Your Seks

Tonight I went to a totally different event, an off-Broadway musical comedy called “The Joys of Sex”. It’s cute, fun and a little risqué! My friend Melissa Levis wrote the lyrics and book, and I can honestly say I would see it again. Critics may call it “Sex and the City” set to music, but I just think it’s a great show and at 90 minutes, you can bring your A.D.D.-challenged friends and they will enjoy it too! The "Joys of Sex" is in previews now at the Variety Arts Theatre (110 Third Avenue) and will open May 12.

Everyday I Write The Book

Last night, I was among the superstars of blogging at the NY Blogger Event at the Apple Store (103 Prince St). There was an interesting and informative panel discussion that featured Nick Denton, Jason Calacanis, Choire Sicha, Lockhart Steele, Jen Chung and blog-famous others. When I looked around the crowd and noticed how intensely the audience was paying attention to the speakers, I realized that I am a geek like the rest of them! Afterward, the crowd converged at Merc Bar and I tossed back a few beers with the creator of Dodgeball, a new service which is like Friendster meets Vindigo on a mobile phone. He told about this fun game that he played last weekend, Pac-Manhattan. I had a blast! However, all this name dropping is giving me a headache, so I gotta get to back to WORK. For more on the event, check out
Standard Deviance.

You're My First, My Last, My Everything

Well, it was actually my wurst! I tasted my first sausage of the season (no jokes please!) as me and a gang of friends went down to the Lower East Side on Saturday to check out the May Day festival at Loreley, a new German bar and biergarten on Rivington. I tried a curry wurst, which was kinda interesting, but what I really loved are the french fries and the beer! The selection of German beer is great, and each beer on tap has a matching glass which is good. It's kinda like Garanimals for beer, so your drinking buddy won't confuse your Spaten, with his Hefewiezen. Gesundheit!